Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
tell me about the fingering
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