I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
