Im at strip club and am horny
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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