My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
