Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
My vagina is very pro this idea
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
