my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize