Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize