yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
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