My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
