yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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