her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
