Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
