i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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