I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize