no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
