is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
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