Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize
