My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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