You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
There r osticjed everywhere
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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