You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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