So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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