Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
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Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
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You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.