Sponge bath it is.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
