He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
