did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
