This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
