they need to just BURY HIM!
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
