Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
