planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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