Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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