I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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