lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize