3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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