Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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