Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
