is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
