Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
