so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
