The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
