Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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