I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
then he tried to convert me to islam
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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