I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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