I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
