well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
