dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize