did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
