She's JV to your varsity
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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