Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
