I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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