have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize