Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize