I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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